A Journey to New Life

By Crystal Sherman on October 13th, 2020

“Metamorphosis”

My journey over the past 10 months has been miraculous. Like day and night, such extreme excellence has bestowed onto my essence. A series of Terrible and Unfortunate tragedies began to happen at a point in the past couple of years. I tried living a double life until anger and sadness consumed me to allow alcohol, drugs, loveless sex, and stress to rule my being. Through every inch of denial, I felt like a caterpillar creeping in my own skin, cruel and cold-hearted, scouring through the darkest corners of my days. Never sleeping and creating mayhem to distance and distract my broken pieces by night.

Usually a selfless type, I ask for and try inflicting good fortune for those around me, but my self-destruction was spreading like a wildfire thus influencing a negative field any way I lingered. While sitting bare, alone, and exposed with a bottle in a bathtub crying and begging for an answer, I turned my face to God and asked Him to Help Me. This was New Year’s Eve. I talked to a woman smoking outside the hotel and she spoke of God and prayed for me though I did not say anything of the feelings I was just experiencing. 

I started feeling myself cocoon, shutting out everything, allowing the evil to convince me it would always be like this and to accept the uncomfortable disposition I carried. Soon, a dear friend brought me to Living hope church. Accepting a helping hand I began to slowly feel my shell crack around me. The more I shed my barrier of despair I had barricaded my soul into, the lighter I began to feel.

This allowed new space to let the word of Jesus back into my life and really absorb what The Lord wanted me to know all this time.

I was never alone.

When I did not know it, He was protecting me even in my most awful decisions or scenarios that presented themselves in my past. I was only losing my way, but He never left me. Since I have been receiving His mercy and grace, my life is finally feeling as it belongs in the right hands now. Like a butterfly, I broke free from the incubation chamber of darkness and felt the warm sun glow upon my wings.

I have been sober now for 5 months, quit smoking after 12 years, and have met and grown with my soul mate James. Our love has bloomed into one of trust, faith, and religion that we share together in our relationship. We have a new home, food, and devotion to keeping God as our center. I now work two jobs back in the medical field helping and saving lives of others each day. Blessings have been showered onto me like the spring rain. When I released the habitual acts I had tethered myself to, it gave me this weightless spirit.

Crystal Sherman